Why no-one's scared of the Lib Dems

Written by David Howarth MP and published in Guardian Unlimited on Tue 4th Jul 2006

Life in the Liberal Democrats is now returning to normal after the excitement of the Bromley byelection - which means being ignored again.

Byelections really are the life-blood of the party, for the simple reason that for a few hours on a Friday morning after a byelection, the radio and the 24-hour TV news bulletins are obliged to utter the magic words "Liberal Democrats", usually accompanied by "it was a good night for ..."

Activists become obsessed with how the result is reported. A headline announcing "a bad result for Labour and the Conservatives" might sound good to non-Liberal Democrat ears, but for us it is a nasty blow - "What about how well we did?" thousands of Lib Dems across the country shout in unison at their radios. If we are lucky, coverage continues until the early evening news, or even, joy of joy, into Saturday.

But by Sunday, the wise columnists, if they mention the byelection at all, are back onto their favourite topic of how it will affect Gordon or Dave.

A 14% swing to the Lib Dems on a Thursday night will by Sunday morning become a 14% swing away from the Tories, and, mysteriously, good news for Gordon, or Tony, or even for Dave himself.

The relationship between the Liberal Democrats and the media is one of the simplest to understand in politics, but one of the least understood.

With very few exceptions, the media come in two flavours - those who hate us and those who ignore us.

Those who hate us do so for a small number of obvious reasons: we are pro-European, liberal and opposed to cross-media ownership. Goodbye, then, to the Murdoch press, to the Barclay brothers press, and to the Rothermere press.

Large numbers of their readers might vote for us, but they are expendable. If we show signs of electoral life, these papers go after us, regardless of the commercial consequences.

The ignoring camp is larger, and in some ways more infuriating.

It includes columnists who spend their entire time extolling the virtues of local income tax, or proportional representation, or civil liberties, or locally-controlled public services, or the virtues of renewable energy over nuclear power, or attacking the war in Iraq, but who then wearily conclude by asking why-oh-why is there no political party in Britain that stands up for such policies?

"There is," we all shriek into our papers, to no avail.

People often ask Liberal Democrat MPs why we are not mentioned in the media more, as if the reason our views hardly ever appear is our lack of effort, or just our lack of views.

Fortunately, we now refer inquirers to the party's website, on which appears a Liberal Democrat observation on almost every subject.

Yesterday, for example, there were eight media releases, including comments on world trade negotiations, transport policy, Brazilian beef, Afghanistan, student debt, incapacity benefit, EuroPride and the BBC and the rights of the Chagos Islanders.

You can count for yourself how many of them appear in this newspaper. Even fewer will appear elsewhere.

Why is this? I suppose journalists will say that these topics are inherently uninteresting, but what they really mean is not that the topics are uninteresting but that that the Liberal Democrats are uninteresting.

Imagine any of those comments coming from Blair or Brown or Cameron, even the comments on the poor Chagos Islanders (who, in case you are wondering, were evicted from their homes 40 years ago to make way for a military base, won a legal case against the government, but now face a lengthy appeal because the government will not let go).

Would Tony, Gordon or Dave go entirely unnoticed on these subjects? I think not.

The real reason was identified by Machiavelli, who said that, if you cannot be both, it is better to be feared than to be loved.

Liberal Democrats are not feared. The traditional reason was that no one thought we would ever exercise power again - power is the real source of fear.

But even the least observant Westminster reporter will have noticed that a situation in which no party has an overall majority is a real prospect for the result of the next election, which is why the other parties are now going out of their way to be nice to us. The prospect of power beckons.

But the absence of fear goes deeper. The underlying problem is that Liberal Democrats are inherently unfrightening.

We might be ferocious in byelections, but everyone knows that we are not going to abuse power.

A Lib Dem Peter Mandelson or Alistair Campbell, by turns bullying and manipulating the press, is a ridiculous proposition.

It might be attempted, but before long both sides would collapse in knowing laughter. Liberalism is just too infused with irony to be threatening.